


Angel & Rebirth

by scots_rock



Category: Monaboyd - Fandom, lotr - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angels, Boys Love - Freeform, LOTR, Lord of the Rings, M/M, Monaboyd, billy boyd - Freeform, dominic monaghan - Freeform, lord of the rings cast - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-15
Updated: 2019-02-15
Packaged: 2019-10-29 02:17:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,572
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17799230
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scots_rock/pseuds/scots_rock
Summary: Rating: R up to NC-17Summary: This happens when an Angel (Dom) and a Mortal Man(Billy) fall in love with each other.A/N: I wrote this story back in 2007. Bare with my teenage self, but I still really like this story. :) Monaboyd memories hit me really hard today. Enjoy!





	1. Kiss Me

He has never seen anything more beautiful in his whole life. It seems that he has simply fallen from heaven, it must really be missing an angel.

 

Blonde fuzzy hair with dark  strands, eyes so deep you can drown in them, lips soft and fragile, he will only speak when it is necessary and if that happens he will tell the truth. He’s normally dressed, dark jeans, a black t-shirt and a dark blue leather jacket. His fingers play with the bows of the sunglasses he’s holding.

 

He’s staring back at Billy.

 

They stay like this for what seems like an eternity, holding up pedestrians and car traffic. Billy stands on one side of the street while the younger looking man stands on the other. They keep watching each other. Nobody wants to turn away afraid he might lose the other man.

 

The lamp turns green and a huge crowd of people crosses their eye line. The younger, blonde man disappears.

 

~***~

 

When darkness surrounds everything and the city falls asleep Billy lies awake in his bed. He feels like dreaming. Things around him seem blurry and shadowy. He stares at the ceiling deeply in thoughts. He’s a wreck. From the moment he has lost view of the handsome man he has been feeling so strange and numb. As if a part of himself was missing. That man has been staring at him. Not blinking, not smiling, not making a move except for his nervous fumbling with the sunglasses. He looked so sad.

 

Billy closes his eyes for a moment. He can see him again. His heart starts immediately beating faster as his blood fastens its speed through his veins. Billy smiles softly. He does this for the first time in a long time. He has no reason to smile lately. But with this stranger in his life, everything has changed within a second, has a meaning now. Billy is still alive because he was meant to meet him.

 

He opens his eyes again, unable to sleep and there he is again. This time it’s not a dream. They young man is standing in front of Billy’s bed looking down on him. His eyes are numb and empty and somehow sad. Billy doesn’t want to ask any questions and he bets the other man isn’t keen on saying anything either. So both keep the silence alive. It lies heavy in the little bedroom.

 

Then the young man begins to speak. Only three little, whispered words but they shatter through the room like an explosion.

 

“Call me Dominic.”

 

Billy breathes slowly and deeply as he watches Dominic pull off his jacket, jeans, and shirt and climb into the bed next to him. Billy positions himself anew to look Dominic in his eyes. They lie on their sides, each of them wraps one hand around the other’s waist.

 

When Billy touches Dom for the first time he at once can feel Dom’s fragileness. The soft skin of his body must be handled carefully and lovingly. Billy knows that Dom doesn’t let himself touch by anyone. Only special persons are allowed to draw fine, invisible lines on his body while kissing him tenderly.

 

Still they keep looking into the eyes of the other but no moves have been made so far. Billy doesn’t know if he shall make the first step but it’s too late to think about that. Dominic already has taken care of that as he presses his lips softly against Billy’s. It feels like magic, like something unreal and fantastic. It’s a short kiss but it’s the best Billy has ever experienced. The place where Dom has touched him with his lips burns and is on flames. Not wanting to lose this feeling Billy moves his head forward and kisses Dominic. This time the young man opens his mouth and his tongue meets Billy’s, both enjoying caresses and warmth of each other. They tilt their heads from one side to the other as they keep on kissing. Dom sucks on Billy’s lower lip and when slowly coming to an end he teases it with his teeth.

 

Dom moves to Billy’s neck and lets his lips touch every part of it. Billy moans silently and is eager to return this loving care. He softly pushes Dom away as he slides down his mouth to the same part of Dom’s neck where Dom has kissed him seconds ago. His lips touch Dom’s skin and the young man whimpers quietly at that.

 

No word is spoken as Billy’s lips and tongue explore every inch of Dominic’s body. He seeks Dom’s chest, nipples, belly, thighs, and knees always returning to Dom’s lips to ease his burning desire by licking Dom’s lips or simply kissing him gently.

 

They finally end up cuddled together under the sheets just like they have started their kissing. Heads turned toward each other, hands resting on hips. Yet, when day breaks and Billy opens his eyes he finds himself alone in bed. Dom is nowhere to be seen. But Billy feels that he will return. Tonight.


	2. Touch Me

Billy isn’t sure if he shall stay at home or go for a walk. His thoughts keep on returning to that amazing night with this stranger. Dominic. Though he hardly knows him, well, actually he has no idea who Dom is and where he comes from, Billy exactly remembers every line of his body, every inch, every freckle, every piece of skin. How has Dominic been able to stay in his head like this? Billy pictures himself with Dominic in every lovemaking way that is possible.

 

Dom’s image stays with him as Billy finally can’t take it anymore and leaves his flat. Torture, it’s pure, unbearable and evil torture. How can Dom do this to him? Make love to him in a way Billy has never experienced and then suddenly disappear without even saying goodbye! Nevertheless, Billy is sure that Dominic will return. Tonight. The thought of Dom coming back and undressing makes Billy so nervous and horny he really has to pull himself together.

 

He fastens his steps as he turns around the corner. Saturday. He hates Saturdays. People everywhere you see. Rushing, hasty and annoyed people. He tries to find his way through the mass of men and women – “Excuse me! Sorry! May I…?” – as he approaches the cross where he met Dom yesterday. He comes to a halt all of a sudden so that a few people bump into him.

 

“Idiot! Watch where you’re going!”

 

But Billy doesn’t listen. Instead, he looks around, lost and helpless, seeking Dom. Maybe he was lucky. Maybe the great gods of all time are on his side today and let him catch at least a glimpse of that handsome, young man that has turned Billy’s world upside down.

 

Again the lights turn green and again Billy’s view is being disturbed. He sighs, annoyed, but tries to defend the spot where he is standing. Men and women brush his arms, his chest, and back as they try to go past Billy. He feels suddenly very small and lonely. He recognizes that he is all alone in an intolerant, rude and violent world. Why now? Why does he think of it at this very moment? Billy’s confused eyes are receiving odd glances by pedestrians. He feels like crying, grief, sufferance, and pain filling his heart. What is this? What is this feeling?

 

He’s about to collapse, right here, in front of all the people, but then out of nothing a hand reaches Billy’s shoulder from the back and rests there, fine, silver rings around thin, long fingers. A familiar voice sounds in Billy’s head.

 

“Stop looking for me. I will find you.”

 

And Billy stops. The feeling vanishes and Billy is thrown back into reality. He turns around and walks back into his flat. There he lies down on his bed and starts waiting for Dominic.

 

~***~

 

“You are not supposed to do that.” Are the words that wake Billy up from a long and peaceful sleep. His eyes meet Dom’s, which are stern and serious.

 

“What?”, Billy asks not understanding Dom’s statement.

 

“You are not allowed to look for me. It’s forbidden. It’s impossible. You weren’t supposed to do that.”

 

Billy reads disbelief in Dom’s voice and sits up.

 

“You would be stunned what I can do. I’m not the kind of guy who sticks to rules, you know? I live as I wish to. Nothing will stop me.”

 

Billy looks into confused eyes. Dom walks around the bed and sits down on the edge of it facing Billy.

 

“You were too near. I could almost drown in you. What did you do to me?”

 

“Nothing. I wanted to find you, you didn’t leave my mind, my heart, my soul. It was like someone has lightened a fire inside of me and now no one can put it out. So, if you ask me what I did to you I ask back: What the hell did _you_ do to _me_?”

 

Instead of answering Dom stretches out his hand and touches Billy’s cheek. Billy closes his eyes and leans into Dominic’s hand. He breathes out, slow and calm. He dares to peek and sees Dom watching him, smiling. For the first time, he has met him. Before Billy can realize what happens to him he is pushed down gently in the soft and cozy pillows and sheets. Dom is still looking at him, not taking an eye off Billy, as he leans down to Billy’s face and kisses him on the forehead.

 

“Dom…You haven’t answered my…oh god…question.”, Billy says, some moans escaping his lips.

 

Dom seems to grin, Billy can’t see cause he keeps his eyes shut. But he feels the grin fill the room.

 

“Not the right question, not the right answer.”, Dom teases and licks his way to Billy’s neck. 

 

Billy reacts somehow automatically to this caress and starts undressing Dom. He wants to touch him, feel his skin on his own, wants to be one with Dom.

 

“So…jeez…what shall I…dear Lord…ask?”

 

It’s too much for Billy. He can’t control himself, he feels his erection growing in his pants and starts breathing a bit faster.

 

“The correct question, love.”, whispers Dom in Billy’s ear. His body moves back, sitting on Billy’s abdomen, as he pulls his shirt off and throws it in a corner.

 

“Give me a hint.”, Billy pleads as he examines Dom’s beautiful chest, the muscles on his arms.

 

Dom tilts his head to the right and seems to think it over. “No.”, he finally says, takes Billy’s hands and leads it to his belt. Billy understands this gesture and at once unbuckles it and frees Dom’s length. Trousers follow shirt and Dom, completely naked, crawls under the sheets beside Billy.

 

Billy doesn’t move, he still lies on his back resisting hard to touch himself. He wants Dom to take over him, let him do with him whatever he wishes. A hand passes Billy’s sight and again rests on his cheek forcing Billy’s head gently to the left side. Billy smiles as he sees Dom’s big and curious eyes.

 

“I despise guessing games, did I tell you that?”, Billy admits and rolls on his left side to have a better view at Dominic. He strokes Dom’s arm several times before leaning forwards and giving Dom a short kiss. Dom’s hand leaves Billy’s face and goes south exploring every inch of Billy’s body. He draws invisible eternity signs on Billy’s chest as he starts kissing him wildly and full of passion. Billy opens his mouth to let Dom in and grabs his back fingers sliding there up and down. So soft. So fragile. So…unreal.

 

Dom’s fingernails start kindly scratching Billy’s abdomen as they go down south finally reaching the pants under which they disappear. He wraps his hand around Billy’s iron hard cock. At this Billy stops the kiss to moan out loud. Dom grins again and starts stroking Billy’s erection slowly then fastening the speed. Billy’s hips thrust into Dom’s hands. Then Dom stops abruptly. Billy whimpers, begs, pleads, prays for release but Dom doesn’t seem to hear him. Then Billy gets it. How can he be so selfish? With this new experience and Dom’s finger around his length, he forgot about Dom’s desires. Embarrassed about his mistake and eager to apologize in a proper way his hand quickly seizes Dom’s cock and squeezes it tightly. Dom closes his eyes and his mouth opens wide in excitement. Billy takes this opportunity to continue their kissing while easing Dom’s desires down there as does the young man and also goes on with stroking.

 

Fast moving, thrusting hips, skin on skin, nearness, warmth, wet lips, tongues clashing against each other, heavy breathing, sexy sweat, and the loving caresses make both men come at the same time, loud and hard, into the hands of each other.

 

Motionless and silent they lie side by side. Billy won’t let him go off that easy this time. He releases Dominic’s cock from his firm grip so he can better hold on to him. He clenches his fingers deeply into the younger man’s skin.

 

“You won’t leave me this time. I won’t let you.”, Billy thinks and is very sure about that. At first, he tries not to sleep, forces himself to stay awake. But with Dom so close to him, his breath on his shoulders, his hand on Billy’s waist, the security Dom gives him Billy’s eyelids cover his eyes and he falls asleep.

 

The next morning Dom is gone.


	3. Feel Me

Billy stays a long time lying in his bed, sheets covering his body partly, thinking. After some time he gets used to the unstoppable tears that stream down his cheeks. A terrible thought occurs to him suddenly. What if Dom only abused him? Get what he wanted and left? That will make him a monster, a beast, who has no feelings. But on the other hand, it all seemed so intimate, so pure. All those loving caresses and touches and kisses… Can it be that it all was just a lie?

 

After a while, Billy stands up and goes to the bathroom. He takes a quick shower switching the water from warm to cold. He has to wake up. It has been a dream. It is stupid to think that Dom feels something for Billy. Confusion overcomes Billy. Unsure and depressed he gets dressed and starts making himself something to eat. While cutting the bread he’s looking out of the window. Rain clouds. Even the skies seem to cry for the loss of Dom.

 

“Fuck!!”, Billy screams and looks down on his now bleeding index finger. “Damn it!” That is just another evidence of Billy’s lack of concentration.

 

His appetite is suddenly gone. Instead, he’s about to wrap a piece of handkerchief around the wound when he halts and watches the blood coming out of the wound. The blood, that’s him right now. Streaming out of his body, out of life, not knowing what will happen next.

 

He throws the unused handkerchief into the bin and sucks at his finger.

 

He is a wreck without him. He doesn’t know what to do with himself anymore. He is completely helpless. And there it is. The fear of Dom not returning. Of Dom leaving him in this state forever. Torturing him. Letting him suffer. He doesn’t even need to keep himself from crying. He has cried all his tears this morning. Why does Dom do this? What has Billy done to deserve such pain? Why…?

 

There it was. The Question.

 

If he stays here he simply will go crazy eventually, Billy’s sure of that. He grabs his rain jacket and slams the door shut behind him. He has to find him. No matter what. No matter if it’s allowed or nor, no matter if it’s impossible. He will find him and he will ask him the question. And this time he will get an answer.

 

~***~

 

He runs around in the city. Again. But this time it’s different. Empty streets, everything covered in gray colors. No people. The now falling rain has shooed them away into their houses, in front of their mantelpieces, with their families and lovers. Billy tries not to think about it. Everyone has someone except for him. He pulls the hood of his jacket over his head and walks on. He thinks about going to the cross where they met for the first time. But then he decides against this idea. He won’t be there, waiting for Billy to embrace him and kiss his tears and fears away.

 

So Billy stands there right in the middle of the main street. He doesn’t really know where to go or whether he shall search Dom at all. Maybe it’s all wrong. Maybe this is it, and not more. Passion and lust. But being where he is right now, feeling the raindrops tickling him and enjoying this, he doesn’t want to go home yet. He looks to the right and sees the small city park. Arriving there minutes later he heads for a little space of green grass and comes to a halt there.

 

Sadness, grief, and pain fill his heart – and guilt. He feels guilty because he has Dom let go so easily. He didn’t hold on to him. He fell asleep. He lay there, eyes closed, dreaming, while Dom edged away silently. He wants to scream out loud, this feeling is so unbearable it is unbelievable. It hurts. Billy is cold and shivers slightly under his jacket, feeling the goose bumps spreading over his whole body. He misses Dom, his touch, his kiss, his hands, his lips. He tries to recall his face, the fine line, the sharp cheekbones, but it all seems blurry and unclear. The rain falls down harder and harder, it’s like a real end-of-the-world-atmosphere, though there is no thunder or lightning, just rain, water. Tears…

 

“I wanna know the reason why.”

 

Billy breathes in sharply. He knows that voice.

 

“Why what?”, he asks silently, a whisper, almost inaudible. His voice has left him. 

 

“Why I can’t stop being around you.”

 

Still, Billy stands there motionless, not looking behind him. For if he does he will throw himself in the arms of Dominic clenching his fingers so deep into the younger man that there is no chance of running away again for Dom.

 

“Why I am sad when you’re not with me.”

 

Billy’s eyes become watery, his lips curl into a hopeful smile.

 

“Why I feel empty each time I leave you.”

 

It is now that Billy turns around to look straight into bluish, gray eyes. He’s so close, standing opposite of him, his breath touching Billy’s skin. His hair is glued to his forehead because of the rain, small water pearls create themselves on Dom’s face, his breathing is steady and calm. His clothes get wetter each second making his black coat shine a little. So do his eyes, sparkling like two diamonds. Dom’s hand rests on Billy’s cheek in the same familiar and loving way as he did the last two nights.

 

“You really wanna know?”, Billy asks, the only sound now coming from the pouring rain.

 

Dom shakes his head slightly. “I know it already. I was only too blind to see.”

 

Billy’s hand covers Dom’s on his cheek. The question lies on his tongue, he just has to ask it in the proper way.

  
”Why me?”

 

Dom smiles at that and leans forward to place a soft kiss on Billy’s lips.

 

“Because you were the only one who saw me. You were the only one noticing me.” Another kiss caresses first Billy’s left then right eye. “I’ve made you a part of me. For I fell in love with you.”

 

Billy’s forehead folds and he blinks several times. “This pain I felt…” His hand slips from Dom’s to the place over his heart gripping his jacket tightly. “It was you…”

 

But instead of answering Dom again kisses him, this time vehemently but still lovingly, his tongue seeking Billy’s. And so they stand while Dom’s great, white wings cover them both keeping the rain from falling down on them.

 

~***~

 

“You’re soaking wet.”, Billy remarks as they enter his flat and Billy takes off his jacket.

 

“Afraid I might get a cold?”, teases Dom.

 

Billy blushes and gets rid of his wet shirt.

 

“Not very waterproofed, that rain jacket.”, notices Dom letting his coat slip to the ground as he slowly approaches Billy. “I’ve missed your face.”

 

He cups Billy’s chin and brushes with his thumb over his lips before placing a kiss there. Billy moans into Dominic’s mouth when Dom rests his flat hand on his naked spine and intensifies the kiss even more.

 

Billy pulls back suddenly and looks into Dom’s eyes.

 

“What will happen after the kiss? After the touch?”

 

Dom doesn’t answer but while smiling he takes Billy’s hand and leads him into the familiar bedroom of Billy’s. After pushing him down softly on the bed Dom unfastens Billy’s belt and pulls the zipper down. He takes off Billy’s trousers and throws them to the floor, then covers Billy’s body with his own one and kisses him again.

 

“After I kissed you after I touched you, I will lie down beside you. I will hold you in my arms till you will fall asleep.”

 

Dom’s head rests on Billy’s chest.

 

“I will feel your heart and I will recognize it beats in the same rhythm as mine. Then I will close my eyes and will fall asleep beside you.”

 

Billy lays his hand on Dom’s head and digs his fingers in that blonde fuzzy hair.

 

“I don’t know if I can bear you leaving me again.”

 

Dom looks up.

 

“I need you, Dom. I…” He can’t speak on, words seem very unhelpful and useless right now.

 

Dom rolls from Billy’s body but keeps watching the Scotsman.

 

“Satisfy me, Billy.”

 

Billy sits up hearing these words, not believing Dom has actually said that.

 

“You want me to…” Billy slides nearer to Dom, a hand reaching out to cup Dom’s jeans-covered arse. “You want me to be inside you? Here?”

 

Dom nods slowly not losing eye contact. Billy smiles and helps Dom taking off his trousers. When they finally lie next to each other, naked skin on skin, Billy starts kissing Dom vehemently, his hand moving up and down Dom’s spine. He goes over to kissing Dom’s neck, shoulders, and when he has difficulties to reach Dom’s back, Dom turns on his abdomen. Billy licks and sucks his way up and down Dom’s soft skin, and when his chest finally meets Dom’s spine, the younger man breathes in sharply. He spreads his legs and starts whimpering and pleading for release. The smile on Billy’s face doesn’t leave, he is ready to satisfy Dom’s desires, as he did for Billy the last two nights. His erection is causing him pain, begging to feel Dom’s tightness around it.

 

Billy’s body moves back so that he sits between Dom’s spread legs. He reaches for the lube hidden in the first drawer of his night table. He squeezes a bit of it on his left hand which after that goes down to his cock. With the other hand, he strokes thighs and knees, kisses Dom’s cheeks before wetting two of his fingers with salvia. He then slowly thrusts one finger into his lover, his respond being loud moans and lifting his hips. Second finger, more moans, almost whining this time. Billy scissors them then pulls out again to replace them by his cock.

 

“Billy…”, Dom breathes, lifting his head slightly then letting it fall down hard on the pillow.

 

When Billy’s completely buried inside Dom he leans forward, caressing Dom’s shoulders and spine with his lips and tongue, while slowly thrusting in and out.

 

“I won’t hurt you…”, Billy whispers into Dom’s ear under faster moving hips. With every thrust moans and whines escape Dom’s lips, which turn Billy even more on.

 

They are one. They seem to melt into each other. Their bodies seem to be made for each other. Billy has never felt anything more beautiful in his whole life when he comes, spreading his cum in Dom. He feels Dom tense and shiver under him and knows that his lover has been satisfied.

 

They lie like this for what seems an eternity. Motionless. Sweaty. Panting heavily.

 

Billy kisses Dom’s neck, nuzzles his hair with his nose. He opens his mouth to speak.

 

“I know what you’re trying to say, Billy. Don’t spoil the moment. Let the silence surround us.”

 

Billy nods, sad and disappointed, and moves away from Dom’s back, rolling to the side. He doesn’t understand why Dom doesn’t want to hear what he has to say. But all his sorrows pass away at once when he feels a hand on his cheek. Dom.

 

“I will keep my promise.”

 

He presses Billy to his chest, wraps his arms around him and both fall asleep.

 

~***~

 

Billy wakes up, lying on his belly, his arms wrapped around the pillow. He opens his eyes slowly and recognizes he’s the only one in bed.

 

“Dom?”, he asks sleepily and looks around. No answer. At once Billy is awake. He looks around, anxious and nervous.

 

Billy’s relieved sigh fills the space as he sees Dom standing by the window, apparently deep in thoughts.

 

“What are you thinking of right now?”, Billy asks silently.

 

“You.”, Dom answers motionless, still staring out of the window, letting the morning sunshine golden on his face. Billy thinks he looks somehow angelic.

 

“Will you leave me?”

 

Dom’s eyes meet Billy’s and Billy can see the sudden sadness in his eyes.

 

“Yes.”, is the quiet response which shatters Billy’s world. “Someday.”

 

He walks over to Billy and lies down beside him. He kisses him gently. Billy feels like crying but the warmth of Dom’s body, his nearness, his love make him forget his tears.

 

“But not now.”, Dom adds in a whisper. “Not now…”


	4. Rebirth: Lose It All

Dom wakes up next to the one he loves. He watches Billy sleeping. He’s not smiling but he neither looks worried. Peaceful. Dom wishes this moment would last forever but knows that it’s not possible. Someday, sooner or later, they will come for him. And then he will have to leave Billy behind. He has never been in love, not even when he was human. He never has experienced love, caring, passion and the fact of being attracted to someone. He is relieved that he has had the chance to get to know that all before returning to where he came from.

 

A sudden knock at the door makes him jump and Billy moves slightly, but he’s still asleep. Carefully Dom pushes the sheets aside, gets up and puts his jeans on. The someone behind the door is getting impatient and his hammering gets harder and faster with every punch. Dominic is forced to walk quickly; he looks through the spy and sees someone he has been already waiting for. He opens up, unwilling, and looks into fresh eyes. The someone is leaning with his two hands against the doorframe and chews gum.

 

“Let’s go.”, he orders.

 

Dominic nods; he must obey otherwise he will be banned.

 

“Can I say goodbye?”

 

The man looks left and right, as if he expects someone to surprise them, then agrees with a little nod. Dominic walks back to the bedroom where he finds Billy lying in bed, eyes open, facing the ceiling.

 

“Ah won’t let ye.”

 

“This is not for you to decide. I have to go. I…”

 

For the first time ever Dom stutters, his voice breaks, he can’t speak on. Instead, he gets dressed slowly.

 

“What are ye doing?”, Billy asks in disbelief.

 

“I am leaving.”, is the subdued answer of Dom’s which makes Billy come to his feet. He approaches Billy and kisses him softly and gently on the lips. “I will miss you.”

 

He turns his back on Billy and returns to the man. He can hear Billy scream, he can feel his pain, he can see deep inside him the tears Billy is crying right now. But there is no way back, he has to go.

 

“At last! What were you doing in there?”, the man complains and shakes his head teasingly causing his shoulder long brown hair to whirl around him. “Thought you were only saying goodbye?”

 

“I am sorry it took so long.”, Dominic answers but does not look up. He walks beside the older man, head down, his shoulders sacked, his body trembling. Everything seems so heavy, it pulls him towards the ground. As they both step outside the building Dominic’s strength leaves him and he collapses to the pavement. First slow motion, then suddenly everything, everyone around him stops moving. He lies on the floor, breathing heavily, his chest is aching unbearably. Voices seem to come from afar, even Viggo’s who is kneeling right next to him, looking worriedly down on Dom.

 

Is it worth existing on when you lose everything? Dom asks himself as his heart starts beating more slowly with each second that passes by. Dominic isn’t sure if he wants to follow Viggo if he really wants to obey this time. For either way, he will lose Billy. Whether he obeys or not, whether he will be banned or not. He isn’t afraid of anything.

There can’t be any bigger pain than this.


	5. Rebirth: Nowhere Left To Go

“What do you think you’re doing?”

 

Viggo’s shout makes Dominic open his eyes again. Still blinded by the light he twinkles sometimes before he gets used to the lightness in Viggo’s apartment.

 

“Can you please stop asking me that?”, Dom answers and sits up slowly. What has happened? How has he got here?

 

“Stop trying to vanish! You won’t win this fight!”, Viggo warns him and goes over to a window to close it. He spits out his gum into a bin and sits down in a chair beside the couch on which Dom is lying. “Why are you doing this? Huh? You know you can’t stay here forever. So why fight? Why resist?”

 

“Because he’s worth it, that’s why!” Dom’s voice is shaking with anger. “Why exist when there is nothing to live for? Why obey? And now you answer me!”

 

Viggo sighs. “They won’t let you disappear. You know that, right?”

 

“What can they do? It’s my own decision. If I don’t want to come back…”

 

Dominic stands up, annoyed and paces through the room.

 

“Don’t you see? I am in love! For the first time in my life I have someone. And when they forbid me to be with him I just…I will not go with you, Viggo. You have to go alone. Tell them they are making a mistake in not letting me be.”

 

“Alright. I’ll tell them. But where else do you want to go? Your time here is ending. Whether you want it or not. For this decision has been already made and you can’t change it. Where else will you hide? You want to go to him? Fine. What will you tell him?”

 

Viggo stands up fast and grabs Dom at his shoulders.

 

“You are what you are, Dom. You are an Angel. This you have to accept. And if you don’t want to be that anymore they will ban you from your past home. You will become a Lost Soul. A Fallen One.”

 

Dominic looks away.

 

“You see? I am right. Come on, Dominic. You don’t really want to disappear, right? You don’t really want to vanish! Risk your being as an Angel! Please, Dominic. Come with me.”

 

Dominic shakes Viggo’s hands off and walks past him towards the door.

 

“Go and tell them what I said. I am not going back. If I can’t have him I have nothing.”

 

With that Dom steps through the door and by doing that he can already feel something changing inside him. Anger is growing, it replaces quietness and calamity, self-control. He falls to his knees, weakened by every step he is making. He’s losing his strength again. Yet this time he won’t wake up again. He will sleep forever, buried in the memory of Billy. His peaceful face, his green eyes, his soft lips, his strong body, his caressing hands. He turns around and lies on his back facing the grey, rainy sky. He feels his heart slowly breaking apart, making shattering noises as if broken glass.

 

An Angel will die today. And he will not go to heaven. Hell is waiting for him for he dared to fall in love with a man. Punishment will be hard and painful. He will lose his wings, his great, white, protecting wings. He will lose his heart, his love vibrating heart. He will lose his memories, his dearest and most valuable memories.

 

“Forgive me, Billy…”

 

His eyes close.


	6. Rebirth: I Feel You Moving Through Me

It is the most excruciating pain he has ever experienced so far. It’s like a sword digging straight through his heart. It is the moment he knows it. Dom has left this world, has left him forever. His knees give in and he falls to the ground of his apartment. Why do they do this? Why do they let them suffer so much? What did they do to make them so angry? Billy clenches his fingers into his chest. The pain… It’s still there and it’s getting worse every second that passes by.

 

“Stop holding on to him.”, a deep, hoarse voice suddenly says to him.

 

Billy forces his eyes open, yet still knees pressed to his chest, appearing very small and helpless.

 

“Ah can’t…”, he replies painfully.

 

“You must. Otherwise, this pain will go on forever. You will fall into despair and lose yourself.”, Viggo explains calmly standing over Billy and looking down on him.

 

“Why are they doing this?”, Billy cries out suddenly, rage vibrating in his voice, the shout filling the whole room.

 

“It’s forbidden. An Angel isn’t supposed to fall in love. Their love belongs to them and just them. What happened to Dominic and yourself is new to us.”

 

Viggo’s eyes close and for a moment he looks hurt and even despaired himself.

 

“He’s not going to return to you. He has vanished.”

 

It is only now that tears are forming their way out of Billy’s eyes, drawing fine watery lines on his face as slowly dropping down to the floor. He is aware of Viggo telling the truth, there is no other explanation for this ache in his heart; he knows that soon it will break apart having no reason in beating on any longer. Billy keeps the silence alive for a while before speaking again.

 

“Ah want a favor. They owe me.”

 

Viggo can already think of something that Billy wishes for but he waits until Billy has concluded his sentence.

 

“Make it stop.”, Billy whispers at last. “Make it never come back again.”

 

“I don’t think you really want this.”, Viggo remarks and steps back from the man lying on the floor, defeated and hurt.

 

“If Dominic could do it, Ah can do it, too.”

 

Viggo nods sadly and leaves the flat. As soon as the door closes behind him Billy’s chest stops hurting, the pain vanishes as quickly as it came. His grip on his shirt loosens, he spreads his legs and arms away from him. He’s lying on his back staring up at the ceiling. His eyes seem to be able to look right through it, through the roof, seeing the rainy dark clouds, breaking through them. He blinks. Light. Bright, white light.

 

Then everything turns black.


	7. Rebirth: I Can't Let You Go

He has never seen anything more beautiful in his whole life. There he stands across the street, his eyes fixed and looking straight at Billy. He doesn’t move at all, everything around them, the  passersby, the cars, the noises and the lights, everything seems blurry as if it is about to disappear completely. They keep looking at each other. Then finally Billy dares to walk over to him, to that man with that blonde, fuzzy hair, and those amazingly blue-grey eyes. When he reaches him he immediately lays a hand on his cheek.

 

“Ah know yer face.”, he whispers. “But Ah can’t remember why.”

 

Billy’s lips press themselves gently against the ones of the stranger. It feels so familiar, the burning on his lips when they separate again, the sweet taste that spreads in his mouth.

 

“This can’t be an accident we meet again.”, the man says. “For I do remember that we met before in almost the same way.”

 

“Dom…inic.”, Billy whispers suddenly.

 

“Billy.”, Dominic responds in the same way.

 

~***~

 

They embrace each other while fierce kisses are shared. Dominic and Billy stumble backwards into the bedroom, already naked, pressing their bare bodies together, trying to melt with the beloved one, become one. Billy falls back on the bed, Dom covers him at once with his body, not wanting to lose the warmth of Billy. Grinding their hips together causes sensational feelings in both men as they start rolling around on the bed sheets, finally Dom lying on top. No time is wasted in covering Dom’s length with lubrication, his fingers already widening, massaging and entering Billy, preparing him. Billy breathes in sharply when he feels Dom’s finger moving in him, eventually reaching his sensitive spot. He moans out loud with desire and want, trying to reach out for Dominic, who has sat up and is too far away to be touched by Billy’s hands. He whimpers which causes Dom to act faster. He replaces his fingers with his cock, slowly and carefully, not wanting to hurt Billy. He leans forwards so that Billy can hold on to him, occasionally digging his fingertips into Dom’s skin. They start moving together, Dom thrusting and Billy responding to it. Hot air, sweaty skin, room filled with moans and hushed whispers, lust rising, enjoying this very moment.

 

They are one. They seem to melt into each other. Their bodies seem to be made for each other. Billy can’t believe this is happening, neither can Dom. It seems so surreal, them both being together again. Both know that their paths have crossed a short while ago. Why that path has been interrupted they do not know. But it doesn’t matter at this moment, their unity proofs that they are made to be together, not parted, not separated by some god-like power. Together.

 

With Billy’s and Dom’s corresponding bodies, feeding each other’s needs, being familiar with the wants and needs of the other one, they come together as it should be. Screaming out each other’s names Dominic collapses on Billy’s fragile and small body. He pulls out of the Scotsman and lies down beside him, at once embracing him.

 

“Do ye have the urge to leave meh now? Like a voice calling ye?”

 

“No, not that I am aware of. And yet…” Dom stops eying Billy. “I think I used to leave you.”

 

“Why do ye think they did this?”

 

“I am not sure. But something must have opened their eyes. Something must have happened which they did not expect.”

 

Billy smiles gently and places a kiss on Dom’s forehead.

 

“Do ye think they’ve learned something from us?”

 

Dom thinks for a moment before answering this question.

 

“Yeah. I think they’ve learned what real love is.”


End file.
